Zorac (zorac) wrote,
Zorac
zorac

Valentine, Shmalentine

So, here we are in the final run up to the most depressing day of the year. I'm talking about this month's Hallmark Day, a.k.a. The One With All The Hearts And Flowers. This year I'll be sending just the one card (it being Dad's birthday on the 14th), and doubtless receiving none. Ah, well...

I'm really not sure what the point of Valentine's Day is - other than making money for card-makers, florists etc. If you're in a relationshp, then quite possibly you're going to have some stress about finding the right gift for him/her, organising a romantic evening or whatever. But if you're happy in your relationship, surely you don't need some officially sanctioned day to treat your partner as someone special. And a Big Romantic Gesture works just as well on any other day of the year - or maybe better, as it would be that much more unexpected. And with Valentine's day, there's always the problem if what you do doesn't measure up to your partner's expectations...

Oh, and for those of us languishing in singledom, it's at best irritating - big read hearts in every shop window, and no chance of getting a table for dinner. At worst it can bring on soul-destroying bouts of depression - the displays everywhere reminding you that you don't have someone, or of past happiness. It comes as no surprise that this day has an elevated suicide rate. (FYI, I'm somewhere betwixt these two extremes).

Last year there was someone I wanted to send a card to - just something to say "You have a Secret Admirer", noting more (that's all that my shyness(?) would permit me). Surely finding such a card should not be a difficult task... First there were all the "to my wife/girlfriend/dog" ones - not really appropriate to the situation. Next there were "I'm so desperately in love with you" ones - which would be rather overstating my case (and probably rather creepy for the recipient). Then I did find one with a fairly tolerable poem on the front - except that the final line inside the card was something like "... I want to get into your pants". Ah. I didn't even bother looking in the one that started "Roses are red, Violets are pluckable..."

In fairness, last year wasn't too bad. There was the small bit of excitement from sending the card (even if it never lead anywhere). In the evening, I busied myself in the kitchen making m00se and lasagne (a silly amount of effort just for one person, but that was, of course, the point). At 8 o'clock, I sat down with my food and, by the all-time most fortuitous piece of TV scheduling, watched Once More, With Feeling! (a.k.a. Buffy the Vampire Slayer: The Musical) for the first time. And just like that, all was right with the world.
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  • 21 comments
For me, it *is* a different thing. Valentine's is about celebrating being with your partner - which is a bit difficult if you don't have one - wheras it's still New Year whether you're by yourself or at a party with all your best mates. That said, I have always had Christmas with family (bar two years with Jo), and New Years and my birthday are so close to that it counts as one prolonged celebration. I think a lot of my rant was directed at the in-your-face commercialisation, and that could certainly be applied to Christmas too. As you point out, different stokes for different folks.
St Valentine's Day is only traditionally about celebrating being partnered (and let's not restrict it to one partner, because poly folk are quick to anger). I suspect that tomorrow being Friday the pubs and pizzerias will be heaving not just with Smug Marrieds but with gaggles of Bridget Jones friendship groups having a Good Time together. It's like Christmas - I'm the most aggressive atheist I know, but I only call it Winterval in self-mockery.

I love commercialisation, but I'm still coming to terms with my new identity as a capitalist whore.
I thought Valentine's Day was traditionally about sending anonymous notes to people you fancied? It is, in fact, a holiday specifically for single people.

(Personally I dislike VD because I dislike cartoony representations of the human heart, fat cherubs, misspellings of 'love' and anything pink.)

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